Sometimes in our life, relationships get in our way and we can’t explain why. We can get to a stage where the chatter in our heads becomes relentless, thoughts fly past and expression becomes foggy and uncomfortable and somehow we feel frozen to doing anything about it. Nothing seems to change!
How does Relationship Coaching help? Relationship Coaching helps functional people achieve their personal and relationship goals.
Who is it for?
It is for those having difficulties in relationships at work with their boss, or peers OR at home with a member of the family – not always a partner!
What is wrong with me?
The need for relationship coaching often comes from a lack of a deep understanding of one’s self as well as that of the person you are having challenges with. Once you return to zero in getting to know yourself again, it becomes clearer what is going on for you with any rift in relationships. There is nothing wrong with you!
What exactly does it involve?
It is the application of coaching to personal and professional relationships. Coaching and relationship coaching are positive, results-oriented professions and people can expect to find themselves advanced into deeper understandings, reflections and actions for change.
Let’s look at an example of a poor relationship with your boss. Could this be what you are thinking or experiencing?
- “She doesn’t trust my capabilities and I’m not being allowed to progress”.
- “Feeling taken for granted and I’m working beyond the call of duty”.
- “It feels like big brother is looking over my shoulder, they expect too much”.
- “Meetings are impromptu, disorganised, too long and ineffective”.
- “The relationship is intrusive, there is no privacy”.
- “He boasts entitlement, who does he think he is?”.
- “There’s little empathy or compassion, passive eyes rolling, sighs of impatience then outbursts of anger”.
- “Nothing is ever right, she changes like the wind, I never know where I am”.
- “It feels like the problem is always mine: too sensitive, too busy, too stressed, too detailed, too clumsy…”
Emotional abuse doubts the reality of another person, leaving the abused very confused and unhappy.
Now what if we forward three months from now, how would it feel if at this time:
- Your and your boss’s best working practices have become evident to you, like a light bulb turned on.
- You can verbalise the gaps in communication with confidence, conviction and purpose.
- You have let go of what you can’t influence.
- You can banish your inner critical voice that gets frequently in your way.
- You can manage expectations by agreement and reach an acceptable level of harmony.
- You are creating an impact, whilst having the best interest for your relationships, your own and your company goals.
- You have boundaries in place that give you the necessary power to hold on to the respect that you work for, and deserve.
- You have understood what was triggering your annoyance with your boss and you are able to let go immediately of the stress that that created.
- Everything is clear now, you know what has to happen; the ‘Universe has your back’!
Abandonment and how it affects relationships.
Abandonment in childhood is one of the many reasons why in adulthood we may find it difficult to overcome what is getting in our way of fulfillment, success or joy.
This is a lengthy, accurately researched article on the subject and is designed to explain some of the deep set impacts that abandonment has on an individual.
It gives examples of stages of behaviour in a relationship, as well as some of the typical behaviours and signs of downwards spiralling in a relationship which may be due to further fear of abandonment. It is meant as a guide for awareness and offers some support. It is by no means a solution that by itself replaces professional help
Verbally Abusive Behaviour
Verbally abusive behaviour has been on the increase during Covid times, it’s a fact! Not all verbal abuse leads to physical abuse but all physical abuse stems from verbal abuse and this should not be ignored.
The following four films were created for awareness purposes and the final and fourth film offers a response to this kind of abuse and provides support.
Sometimes a relationship can become a verbally abusive relationship and it is not always obvious to the abused that she/he is in one:
Film 1 Verbally abusive behaviour
Explanation to denial
(To view the film below, please enter DR13 as the password.)
Film 2 Verbally abusive behaviour
Experiences of the abused
https://www.linkedin.com/embed/feed/update/urn:li:ugcPost:6766012542771834880
Film 3 Verbally abusive behaviour
Characteristics of the abuse
https://www.linkedin.com/embed/feed/update/urn:li:ugcPost:6769620913982849024
Film 4 Verbally abusive behaviour
Response to abuse
https://www.linkedin.com/embed/feed/update/urn:li:ugcPost:6773204328619483136
“I needed somebody who could listen to me and help me believe that what I was experiencing in my relationship was real and not just in my head. All the ‘crazy making’, problem shifting and manipulation had reduced my marriage and me to shreds. Deborah’s coaching, her deep compassion and vision helped me pave my own way efficiently through my own divorce. I understand that wherever I was, at any stage, it was where I needed to be . I am now ready for new chapters with the knowledge that this kind of support is at my finger tips, shoud I ever need to check in again. Thank you! A grateful survivor of an abusive relationship!
“Relationship Package” 2 months duration – fast track!
Limited places for this jam packed program which will support and accompany you immediately if you are experiencing a difficult relationship. You will have my full attention for the two months that we work together (and beyond if you wish). Never will you have experienced such a shift in self-knowledge, mindset and action (where YOU want it)!
Includes:
- 6 sessions of coaching of between 60 and 90 minutes each
- Personality Profile Evaluation included – this enables a full understanding or blue print of how you and others function (this may be somebody who is currently challenging you) in either a working or home environment.
- Energetic Profile Evaluation included – this enables you to see through your own lenses and those that might serve you better, raising your energetic profile very quickly to acquire optimum results both at work and at home.
- Analyses on what happens to you when you are under stress, how you are behaving and how you will consciously change that for the better.
- Report on your top values which will re-align how you are performing along side them and explain some of your triggers and reactions.
- One hypnosis session – through exploration, discovery, repetition and affirmation we are able to block out what is really getting in your way (this is optional).
- 30 minutes follow up session 1 month after programme completion
What clients have said from working through this programme:
I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for enabling me to reach a new galaxy of life
The ELI assessment makes so much sense to me. The Law of attraction shows me how I have been attracting the wrong people into my life, all my life!Deborah has changed my life and enabled me to let go of my fears, to partner with myself and to be at peace. She showed me that if you want not only to be ‘a part of a change’, but ‘the change itself’, it has to be my own responsibility to make it happen.
Vic